Take charge of communicating with alter egosFebruary 7, 2024 Kristian McElroyprintsEvery morning I think about communicating with my alter egos. I embark on a journey deep into myself and board the inner bus where my alter egos arewaiting for me. After the call and the gentle reminder that I was the only driver, we headed out for the day’s route.
Over the years, my alter ego and I have embarked on a winding path of unproductive and hostile communication, initially marked by fear and instability. However, with time, understanding and perseverance, we have learned to navigate this complexterrain and foster adialogue that supports our overall well-being through communication with alter egos.
Communicating with others is a journeyI have found that living with dissociative identity disorder (DID) makes communicating with others a crucial aspect of daily life. These changes may exhibit helpful, supportive, logistical, destructive, conflicting, or malicious behavior and cause stability and functionality issues.
However, through patience, empathy, and developing a variety of strategies, we found a way to promote better communication and collaboration between the alter egos in my inner system.Communication with Alter ToolkitDuring my journey with DID, I discovered several tools that have proven invaluable in facilitating communication with my alter egos.
Active Listening – By listening empathetically to each of my alter egos, regardless of their behavior or language, I validate their experiences and emotions, thereby strengthening the sense of respect and appreciation in my system.Set Boundaries – Setting clear boundaries and communication protocols gives structure to my system.
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This reduces the screams and fire alarms I hear internally, making it easier to communicate with my alter egos and building trust and stability.Give Space – Giving each age room to express themselves without judgment promotes authenticity and paves the way for building confidence that I will help the age group meet their needs and shows that we can support each other as a team .Participation in therapy – Therapy was a mixed experience for me.
However, having a therapist who I connect with, who makes my alter egos feel safe, and who has experience with DID and Internal Family Systems (IFS) has given me valuable tools for conflict resolution, dealing with facial trauma, and Promotion of communication between alter egos.Be Confident – Up until last year, the way I talked about myself and my DID was pretty negative. This negative self-assessment of myself and my alteregos sent a message of hostility that did nothing to build security and trust. I’ve learned that it’s okay to have a bad day, but being aware of how I talk to myself and how my language affects my changes helps reduce the hostilityin my system.Go Further: Communicate with Alter Egos